Search
  • Jan Ockendon

Is it really a "comfort zone"


We call this space we get stuck in sometimes a "comfort zone" but is it really that? The comfort zone is really a psychological and sociological construct, it describes a place where we feel familiar and therefore "safe" and in control. If you look at a lot of the images you can find online around the comfort zone is a fear zone where we become affected by others opinions and and lack confidence. What if the place you stay in and can't escape because it is your familiar, "safe" place is also a place where you also feel unsafe and tormented. What if your familiar zone brings with it abuse, fear and uncertainty. Would we still call it a "comfort zone"? In some ways it is I guess, it's what you're familiar with, you probably also feel "safe" to some degree. If someone grows up with an experience where they were bullied or felt unsafe in another way that can lead to a normal where fear, bullying and abusive comments are what is expected. It's then very difficult and actually scary to move away from that to something more caring and balanced.



If we then think about the voice in our own head and the words the voice uses to describe us as "not good enough" or a "bad mum/sister/daughter". If that voice has been there for sometime then it becomes familiar and to some degree "safe" just because it is what we know well. It's always there, it gets louder sometimes but it's there all the time. It "comforts" with it's familiarity and is our normal. It feels uncomfortable to stay there but scary to challenge that voice and believe something different. It might take something difficult happening to push us towards recognising that something needs to change that our "comfort zone" has become so uncomfortable we can no longer stay where we are. Often we need some help to do that, another person who can help you by asking the right questions and reflecting back to you what you have said. Another person who can be by your side and hold your fear and their own belief that you can change that voice and rewrite the story you are telling yourself.

Stepping outside your comfort zone brings huge rewards as well as through that scary path comes growth.

It takes a leap of faith to start the process but imagine what is on the other side, we need to become comfortable with being uncomfortable. Past that fear zone there is a zone of learning and growth. A place where great things can happen and things can change so much we really can achieve what ever we want to. Can you imagine it? Are you ready to change and take that step out of your comfort zone or maybe you have already done that. If you have amazing, you rock.

5 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All