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  • Jan Ockendon

Do you set yourself goals or intentions?

Do you often think "I wish I could change..." but feel really overwhelmed. Let's think if there might be a way to make it easier to make a start.


If you could change ...?. what would be different about your life? What would be the 10/10? How would it feel, how would you benefit from the change? Can you imagine now how it will feel when you have achieved your goal, describe it to yourself. How it feels, what difference has it made to your life, how have you benefitted. Can you describe it as if it has happened. Great, write it down. If it is written down you have committed to it. Give it a time scale but be realistic. If you want to commit to starting and running a successful business or running a marathon and you are currently not on the first step setting yourself a goal of a fortnight just is unrealistic. Is your goal or intention written in a positive way? Remember what happened when you were a child or if you have children yourself. You were probably told or told your children, don't touch that! Did that stop you or change what you did? Probably not, in fact it quite likely had the opposite effect and made whatever it was more appealing and much more touchable. So if your goal is to "lose weight" will that be different? Chances are not to your brain, in all likelihood that food and unhealthy lifestyle will look pretty appealing. What would happen if it was changed? What is your why for losing weight, how will you benefit from losing weight? Can your goal be written like that instead? For example, it is December 31st 2020 and I am wearing my favourite dress to go to x's New Year party. I feel fabulous, confident and hot. Is your goal challenging? Making you goals challenging is a good thing, we all need to have something to reach for. Nothing will change if you always do what you've always done. It does need to be realistic though, striving for something unachievable is soul destroying and will not be helpful.

So now you have written down your intention and made sure you have a realistic and achievable timescale what next? What needs to happen first? It might help to start with looking at where you are now. Think about what needs to happen to get you one step closer to where you want to be. What are the options, all the options no matter how challenging. Remember, challenging is good but overstretching yourself and not achieving what you have decided is a first step is not helpful. Like your ultimate goal think about setting a time scale, make it realistic and achievable. How will you know when you have achieved, how will you feel? Is it going to help you get closer to that ultimate goal.

Review your goals regularly, as we change so does what is important to us.

I hope this has given you a small insight into how change and setting a goal for your life does not need to be overwhelming. We don't climb a ladder or our staircase in one go so why would we reach our goals like that.

Try it and see how it goes. Good luck.

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